The Blog: Spellbound by our own imperfect lives...

  Regis popped over one morning to see Ella and Alex. I'm not sure but it looks like she's pulling out his cheeks to make him smile. That's a bossy sister for you!     Alex looks pretty happy with the Saturday morning routine...cartoons, jammies, rough housing with Dad and Ella, smiling for the camera. Oh, to be a baby! January has been kind of a grit your teeth and get through it month for us. It's been cold, snowy, dark, and gloomy. The kind of month where cave people just huddled over the fire and grunted. We have high hopes for February, starting next Sunday with a Superbowl party. That doesn't mean much to me except for a chance to have the kids over, eat good food, and laugh a little. Who cares about the football game. We're having man food at the Superbowl party: bratwurst, pretzels, chicken wings, chili cheese dip, M&Ms, and puppy chow. We'll be partaking of some of the Winterfest events in February, too. I'm sad that there isn't a pa...

Well, it's Friday tomorrow. You can't be cranky on a Friday. Regis said he's tired of winter but I don't think we can complain about winter yet. It could last a good long time so we should conserve our complaining until we're closer to spring. Maybe mid-March. Tomorrow's Friday. There is reason for optimism.

I haven't been cranky for a long time but this is the night. I can't even say why exactly but I feel a nasty ass mood hanging over my head like a big black cloud. Regis did his best...poured me a glass of wine, put my slippers by the table, made a nice soup for dinner and I am appreciative of his efforts. I feel like weeping.

Don't worry about reading the play by play here. I was only in the same room as the football game. Everyone who expressed enthusiasm and optimism got this message: Knock wood and get used to disappointment, my friend. I went to bed at half time and was better off for it. It's wretched out there tonight. We had a work day today so there were no kids at school and half of the teachers left early. It's hard to work up any enthusiasm for anything sitting in a cold and quiet building when the snow is swirling outside. You'd think it would be a good environment for mental activity but not so. I went to work out this morning and it was cold but not so windy. When I came out 90 minutes later, the wind nearly took me across the street. The snow came sideways. Someone told me they saw a pheasant trying to cross the highway and it couldn't fly and it couldn't walk so it sort of sat there and got pushed across the road. Poor thing. Heck, I was at the Pulse and a cat fol...

Three nights this week, mediacom, our illustrious internet provider did not provide internet service. They claim they had major outages over the entire midwest and they used the lame ass excuse of ice. They probably sent the switchboard guy home for a few days because he didn't wear his pocket protector. If you live here, you know the weather has been wretched. Last week, we had our January thaw which was welcomed. Temperatures in the 20s, warm sunshine, and balmy breezes instead of the weather that can kill you if you fall down taking out the trash. This week, the temperatures have been in the 30s which makes for slop. Slop on the streets, slop falling out of the sky, slop everywhere. The sky has been gray. The precipitation doesn't know what it's supposed to be, rain or ice or anything in between. You're half scared to leave the house because if it gets one degree colder, you'll have to skate home. Ah, well. I wasn't going to complain in 2010 and I'm not...

I thought January was supposed to be one of our sunnier months. Not so this year. Today was like being in a monster cloud all day long. Cool hoar frost, though. I was lying on the mat at the Pulse today after my run, stretching and trying to relax. I was listening to Raising Sand on my iPod...Allison Kraus and Robert Plant, singing along to Gone, Gone, Gone...when I realized that the dude on the treadmill was looking at me funny. I remembered that Regis comes running to see what's wrong whenever I sing. Bet I scared that guy! You know how you sing sometimes when you know you can't sing out loud so you sort of sing to yourself and it comes out like this horrific moaning hum? Anybody else do that? This is the song and believe me, they sound better than I do. I bought some sugar-free chocolate at Trader Joe's in December and it was delicious. I wish I had some right now. Anybody going up to TJ's, let me know. I'll put in an order.

I want to watch Two and  a Half Men and I can't multi-task so I have to write this in seven minutes. I had a funny story to tell but it has completely slipped my mind. Last week, I was chatting on Facebook with a cousin of mine who I have never met. He suggested we start a Facebook site for cousins and relatives of my grandma and grandpa on my mom's side. There are hundreds but so far only about 30 have joined. It's a damn hoot. All the old pictures are really fun to see. There are cousins from all over the country. Amazing thing that Facebook. I was busy in the kitchen tonight. I made chicken thighs, an egg bake, a batch of muffins, and steak tips with peppered mushroom gravy. The last had lots of mushrooms and was delicious. Tomorrow night I'm making meatballs and split pea with ham soup. I was out of lunch material in the freezer so this will help. Time to go.

We took Young Regis out for a birthday burger and a beer tonight as it's his 32nd birthday. That means he's moving in on 40 and you know what that means...we'll be The Old People for real. We gave him a yellow fedora and a Bible that has a place cut out for a flask. Tacky, we know but what the hell. We thought he'd laugh and he did. While we were at Patrick's, Brian told us about a field trip to something called Beer Dabblers at the Winter Carnival. It includes a bus ride and four hours at the beer tasting which we have decided might be too much for us. It sounds like a lot of fun, but like it might just kill us flat out. We're watching the Golden Globes. Aside from not knowing many of these people, it's tiresome to hear about all the great, funny, awesome, creative geniuses in Hollywood. Oh my tired ass. Isn't there anyone there who is marginally amusing, lazy, and homely? Also, really do we need to see all their belly buttons and butt cracks? Ti...

We had a busy week and I believe I predicted it. Parent/teacher conferences on Monday, safe driving for old people on Tuesday, haircut in Mankato on Wednesday, burgers at the Legion on Thursday. Tonight I came home from school and finally took the decorations off the Christmas tree. Regis cooked a beef roast in the crock pot with carrots, onions, mushrooms, and potatoes. I fiddled around picking things up and sorting and organizing and now I'm watching the comedy channel. Tiffany and I are headed to Canby (with Elliot) tomorrow to see my mom. Regis has decided (I think) that the burden of school work is too much and he better stay here and get a head start on his homework. Community College is not all silver saddles and Sunday parades. He has tough classes this semester and they've started out like runaway trains. There is a significant snow event predicted for next weekend. What the hell. I can't believe that they can predict weather that far in advance because pretty ...

We decided to leave the Christmas tree up for a while because we (the royal we, Joanne) like the lights. I was picking up junk today, though, and decided to get out a few Valentine decorations. I hope this isn't a big design faux pas. Mixing holidays. Most of the Valentine type things are dishes and towels so they're all on the dining table...two red-stemmed glasses, four liqueur glasses with red dots, a red tray...hey, wait. I'll take a picture. Aren't they pretty? Red is my favorite color. Speaking of red, I did a little online shopping today. I love the clearance sales. Nothing like a good deal. I bought a red jacket...hope I don't look the line usher at the mall Santa photo studio. Most of the stuff in wintery because, I suspect, we have quite a bit of winter left.    This is a picture I took out the front door this afternoon. The sun is shining and it's beautiful out there. I'm staying inside today, though. I thought about going to yoga but dec...

I slept late this morning...well, 7 o'clock...then went to the Pulse for my workout. It was crisply cold. Crunchy cold. I came home and made a quiche, then got in the tub with a cup of coffee. Good way to warm up fast. I took a nap this afternoon. Read a catalog for a while then took a nap. Great way to spend a Saturday afternoon. About 3, we went to Tom and Betty's. They went to St. Louis Park to fetch Michelle this morning so we stopped by to see her, gab a little, and order up a pizza. Nice way to spend an evening. (the new domino's pizza is marginally better than the old domino's pizza) I might do some cooking tomorrow. We have a busy week (I'm storing up energy for the week, you see) so maybe I can brew up some soup or chili or something. Monday night I have conferences and Tuesday night we have to teach safe driving for old people. We're going to retire from that gig. It's a drag. Wednesday I get a haircut and Thursday is burger night at the Legi...

Regis made some delicious chili for dinner last night. I've been using the same chili recipe (in my head) for years and years. He read about chili in a magazine and tried a couple new tricks. I must say it was very good. I'll ask him if we can publish the recipe with his adaptations. His intellectual property, you know. I wore a skirt and my cowboy boots to school yesterday and I'm paying the price today for baring my legs. I know there is no basis for this belief in real science but I think the gods of winter are putting the smack down on me. My cold came back with a vengeance and I feel like curling up under an electric blanket. Today, I go back to the base layer, ugly wool, and boots and who cares what you look like. The fashion police have moved to a warmer climate. It's below zero right now and the forecast is calling for six inches of blowing snow and wind chills in the 30 below range. What the. This defies the common knowledge. What happened to it's too ...

I'm at the hospital and meals on silver trays are being served from little white vans in the parking lot. Scott and Marsha who stole Cindy's May basket in third grade slide down the fire escape, a huge metal tube coming out of the third floor window of the dusty school. My dog Kramer drives by in a Volkswagen Beetle waves his red-mittened paw and honks the horn. A man with a banjo gets off the bus and hands me a white envelope. As the bus pulls away I see his face on a poster on the side of the bus.

Elliot came yesterday and spent the night at our house. It isn't an easy accomplishment because we have a non-child friendly pet who needs to be shuffled back and forth from outside to locked bedroom like a common criminal. This means Elliot sleeps in a porta crib in the living room and I sleep on the couch. He wasn't so happy with the arrangement this time and woke many times during the night to be comforted. A little rocking and he went back to sleep. I feel like I was pulled through a knot-hole butt first, though. He's a character and I enjoy his company. He's decided that he only wants to feed himself...no more spoons and such. He's very clever in figuring out ways to get the food off the tray. Slippery little pieces of peach get scooped over to the edge and slid up where he can grab them. Today for lunch he had peaches, carrots, peas, and bananas. He loved the tiny pieces of toast with jelly which makes him a baby after my own heart. Always choose the bread pr...

We took Ella to Patrick's for lunch yesterday as a pre-birthday celebration. We had princess napkins, she ordered a Cha Cha basket and pink lemondade, and she opened her birthday presents. The favorite seemed to be a character doll from High School Musical who came with a microphone. Ella exclaimed, "How did you know I loved this?" Oh, to be four years old. We went to Tom & Betty's last night for a wonderful dinner of prime rib roast, baked potatoes, popovers, and cheesecake. We watched a few episodes of Twilight Zone and the documentary Two Fat Ladies, One Large Life . It was a lovely way to end the year and the decade. Two Fat Ladies is a cooking series from BBC and it is a real damn hoot. The documentary is about the life of one of Jennifer Paterson and it's hilarious as she was quite a character. If you like cooking shows, it's worth a look. We don't have much going on today. I'm going to put ribs and kraut in the crock pot and we'...