easter

We had a nice gathering at Bob and Emily's. There are more pictures here. I took Ella for a little walk after dinner but she was more interested in looking into the ravine at the river than in strolling too far. We read Peter Rabbit several times. She missed the part about Mr. McGregor putting Peter's dad into a pie (frankly, I don't remember that either) but she was very concerned about Peter crying when he couldn't get out of the garden. Popop pulled some quarters out of her ears before we left and she thanked him. She said she wouldn't want to go to bed with those in her ears. She's a hoot.

If you like words, this is a very cool website that I stumbled upon while searching for a name for a goat that begins with Z. One of the pages is called The International House of Logorrhea:

logorrhea log-uh-RI-uh, n an excessive flow of words, prolixity [Gr logos word + roia flow, stream] Welcome to the International House of Logorrhea, a free online dictionary of weird and unusual words to help enhance your vocabulary. The IHL is a component of The Phrontistery, which has many other free word lists and unusual word related resources. Check it out, not so much to build your vocabulary, but maybe to discover a good name for a goat.

easter

Happy Easter to My Peeps!

Here I am dressed to go to Bob's for Easter dinner. Regis thinks it's a little outlandish but I think it's a good look for me. Ella will love it.

Same old stuff here. Got outside a little bit yesterday. Bought some pansies. Tom says that's a bad name for them since they're pretty tough. Good one, Tom. I woke up in the middle of the night worried about them, though, so I waddled into the yard in my pajamas and brought them into the house. Waking up to frozen pansies on Easter morning would be a drag.

We went to Tom's with a pizza last night. Regis and Tom had the Classic Combo with a few bottles of Harp while I had two tablespoons of yogurt and one tablespoon of applesauce. It didn't even hurt.

Moving on into the day....more later.

dream

I got up in the middle of the night to take some Roxicet. I just couldn't sleep and thought it would help. It did, of course, but it sent me this weird dream. Joanne convinced me to go to a sorority party only it was all middle-aged women dressed very smartly in business clothes. They walked in neat lines and talked in low voices. I had a tantrum saying she talked me into going and I didn't want to be there. But then I saw Elliot and Joanne had taught him to talk when he was four months old so the fancy ladies were amazed. But then somebody made a crack to me and I threw my drink all over the steps. Getting feisty in a dream. That could be a sign of something.

I'm getting all my food and vitamins and logs organized today. This is a full-time job, man. I have to take 30 minutes to eat a meal that is 4-6 tablespoons of food. Then I wait 30 minutes before I start sipping water. I have to drink 48-60 ounces of water a day. I stop drinking 30 minutes before a meal, take 30 minutes to eat, then wait 30 minutes to drink again. There are vitamins to take with food and vitamins to take between meals. It's quite a regimen.

Regis is going out to do some errands today. He's going to get a new wheelbarrow for me since we can't remember what happened to the old one. It probably rusted away. We need bird seed and I need a thing old people use to remember to take their pills. There are a couple other things on the list but I can't remember what they were.

I think I'll stick close to home and wander around the block from time to time. I thought I would take my bike out for a ride but Regis vetoed that real quickly. He said it was a bad idea for seveal reasons so I guess I won't do that.

I have half a mind (hahaha) to get some pansies today. I'm anxious to start gardening.

is this for real? OMG this is hilarious

Twittering the passion: NYC church plans performance of Christ story in 140-character tweets

Last update: April 10, 2009

NEW YORK - Experience the Passion of Christ — in 140-character bursts.

In a marriage of Christian tradition and digital technology, Wall Street's Trinity Church is using the micro-blogging service Twitter to perform the story of Jesus Christ.

The main characters will tweet the Passion play for three hours beginning at noon on Good Friday. The feed also can be delivered to mobile devices or e-mail addresses.

The lower Manhattan Episcopal parish also is offering a Web version of the Stations of the Cross.

The church was founded by a small group of Anglicans in 1697.

Commentary: Do these people think this is a religious experience? Isn't this funny? They're going to tweet the Passion play for three hours? What the....?????? Does God have a Facebook page? Can I be a friend?

perspective on things

Regis called me from work a few minutes ago. They were insistent that he come in, even though I just got home from the hospital yesterday. We were a little worried because they have been cutting people, and we were right to worry. He lost his job today. I know we aren't immune and there are surely people less prepared than we are to weather something like the loss of a job. But when the bad economy comes and sits right in your living room, it puts a different face on things.

home at last and amazing bowel sounds

I wish I could record the bowel sounds I am making so I could post them here. If you've ever been to a NASCAR event, I think it would be similar to that. Screaming race cars coming around the bend.

I came home about 1:00 today, took some pain meds, and crawled into bed. I slept for two hours and it felt so good to be in my own pajamas, my own socks, my own bed. I'm up now sipping a soy milk and protein warm drink (this is not my entire eating future...just the menu for now) and making these wonderful noises.

I have some really cool spring green socks with big white polka dots on them. I took them to the hospital but they insisted on those traction hose and ugly gray slippers. Blogger is not uploading pictures at this time or I'd post a photo of the sox.

I've been watching Mike clean out his garage today and remembering when we did it. Nothing like exposing all your bad and disorganized habits to the world. I thought our garage sale days were over but Young Regis has some stuff he wants to get rid of so we might have one this summer. I believe in low maintenance garage sales. Just put the stuff on a table and let people make an offer.

As much as this disappoint Cousin Deb, I think I will give up my description of all things bowel and intestine related. Regis said it was like walking with a lioness tonight. There, that's my last comment. Deb, I'll still email comments to you.

new event in the patient olympics

I am the winner of a new event in the Patient Olympics. When I came into the hospital, my blood sugar was 140. I've never been diagnosed with diabetes but they called it "impaired" glucose. Today, my blood sugar was 61. (Song from Rocky...) I had to drink some apple juice to bring it up a little.

I slept really well last night due to my little friend, oxycodone. What a drug. I had some shoulder pain that was way worse than any of the abdominal pain so they gave me oxycodone about 11 since I was off the fentanyl pump. I slept like a rock star...better than any other night. The shoulder pain comes from the gas they use to poof up the abdomen during surgery. It settles in the shoulders which is weird. They recommend the walking as a way to ward off that pain, and well, I was the winner in that event, so by all rights, I should not have had that pain. Harrumph.

No pain this morning and I feel good. I'll write an update after the doctor comes by because I know everyone is as interested in the details of my care and recovery as I am.

progress report

I'm off the O2, off the catheter, off the IV, and off the IV painkillers. I still have a drainage tube and a needle in my hand, just in case, but that's it. The liquids have been going down fine today. Steve and Sherry came for a visit and we walked down to the fountain and sat in the sunshine. I don't have much pain (more like discomfort) even when I move so that's a good sign. Regis is coming in the morning and will take me home after lunch if I am tolerating pureed food.

a true test of a guy's ingenuity

Writing several posts a day for my blog is tough duty when I spend most of my time lying on my back or stumbling down the hall with an IV pole. Everyone has the same zombie look here, the same blue nightie, the same tube-covered pole, the same dazed stare, the same bad hair. At least you don't worry about making a fashion statement.

The pain killing drugs have a weird effect on my mind. I just had a little nap and the experience was that the voices in the hall sounded like the voices of people I know, but they were talking about unfamiliar things like if the guy across the hall should continue to wear his support hose. I think I said this before too, but it makes me really blabby and sort of overly friendly. I was going down the hall on a cart the other day, waving and talking to everyone. Then I saw my surgeon and called out to him. It makes me repeat things, too, as you have no doubt noticed.

I've decided I don't like the taste of sugar free anything. Whatever they use for the sweetener is fairly repulsive and is probably like sorbitol and we all know the ill-effects of that. My Ukranian doctor calls it flatus. When he mentioned it to me, he added "gas" by way of explanation. Yes, I know the word. Maybe he was concerned about it coming across in translation. For some reason, it is funny to hear someone with that accent talking about gas. Cousin Deb, you would love it. Gas and poop are really popular subjects here.

I think my pillow is made from plastic and it makes the back of my head itch like I have lice. I'm painting a lovely picture here, right?

news in hospital land

Let's see. I went for a walk. I went to the bathroom twice. I sat in the chair twice. This is all documented on my white board report card. I make sure the nurses fill it in before they leave. Most of the time they give me smiley faces.

I had sugar free kool aid, sugar free jello, and chicken broth for lunch.

I hope Sherry smuggles in some cookies later. Just kidding.

Tiffany called and we visited for a while.

Did you know that when nurses get the air out of a hypodermic needle, they squirt the liquid on the floor? That seems odd.

My stomach is about the size of my thumb right now. Not much fits in there, even liquids. That's why the cookies would be a really bad idea.

Who'd a thought it could take 30 minutes to eat a half cup of jello.

Nobody seems to bus the dishes around here.

There is no such thing as too much information for nurses. They want to know about everything and usually they want to see everything. Really. This is why it would be a bad job for me.

shower

I took my first shower and I'm wearing a clean hospital gown. A few weeks ago, I went shopping for pajamas, not realizing how inconvenient they would be in the hospital. The blue things with the wide open backsides are doing just fine today.
Funny the things I find to brag about. I did spare you, gentle readers, a few details that went to Regis by email.

patient olympics

Jen just came in and pronounced me the gold medal winner of the patient olympics. She said I'm way past others who had surgery the same day (I'm not competetive...just about some things) and she confirmed the going home plan. She also gave me the plan for getting off the pole (IV, pain killer, O2). The one thing I don't like is the breathing machine. Ugh. I have to perform well in that event to get off the O2 cannula.


Betty, I'm sure our daily swimming helped my in-shapedness for this. I can hear the Rocky song...ta da da...da da da. Or is that the fentanyl drip?

loss of propiety

I was walking down the hall last night dragging a bag of urine behind me, pushing a pole with about a hundred lines and monitors, with a three-day old hairdo and an ugly hospital robe. The new pajamas in my bag haven't see the light of day and I haven't had a shower since Monday. So far I have not gone out with my ass flapping in the wind but that could be coming. I've seen other people do it. I had male nurses (Todd and James) last night which made me squeamish at first but they were't bothered by my old self so I decided to not be bothered by them and they were wonderful caretakers. Meghan took the catheter out this morning (Regis says I am giving too much information which isn't like me.) so I'm independent in the john. I also get to drink clear liquids and I can tell you that sugar-free cherry kool-aid tastes grand. If things continue to go well and move through the system (so to speak), I'll be able to go home Thursday afternoon. Is that tomorrow?

i'm back

But can't write much. Tubes hanging off my hands one of which is a fentanyl drip. More later...

Comfortably Numb

Teresa finally got to the room. About 20 people all crowded around hooking things up, poking, prodding, and generally pissing the old girl off. Then they hooked her up to the morphine drip. Suddenly she is seeing the world like in an entirely different way. I think that all those people are still annoying her, but she doesn't seem to care. The remainder of the day will no doubt be devoted to sleep and weird dreams.

Hello.
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me.
Is there anyone home?

Come on, now.
I hear youre feeling down.
Well I can ease your pain,
Get you on your feet again.

Relax.
I need some information first.
Just the basic facts:
Can you show me where it hurts?

There is no pain, you are receding.
A distant ships smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I cant hear what youre sayin.
When I was a child I had a fever.
My hands felt just like two balloons.
Now I got that feeling once again.
I cant explain, you would not understand.
This is not how I am.
I have become comfortably numb.

A Guest Appearance from the Sultan Of Sarcasm

Good morning to all. Teresa made the call last night and discovered that the honor of her presence was requested at 5:45. That was both good and bad. The good was that she had little time to truly morph into the Nervous Patient. The bad was that we needed to be front and center at 5:45 after what I will charitably characterize as a night of rest. It was actually worse than that. Who sleeps well away from home? Who sleeps well when their nerves are on edge? Who sleeps well when their partner spends half the night traveling back and forth to the latrine, the result of the time honored ritual of bowel prep?
So Teresa is currently in surgery. They have the family's waiting experience as finely honed as that of the patient. First came the short tour, then multiple cups of coffee provided by the
wonderful volunteers, and finally the constant updates. "They just took Teresa in, Sir." "They will be inducing sleep and inserting the catheter soon, Sir." "We will be back to take you to her room to wait, Sir." They also have a large screen devoted to keeping on updated on the progress of each patient identified only by number. I found that those around me were into watching the board as though it was a horse race. There was a motley group looking as though they had made the trip up from the State Hospital who provided commentary. "Hey, look, 850159 (Teresa) is in surgery at 8:03. They are in the lead." "Look, 850177 is in recovery way ahead of everyone else." "Dude, look, they took mom's number off the board. I wonder what they means?" The sudden appearance of the chaplain, and her surgeons (pictured above) should have been a clue, but I digress. So here it is 11:00 and I am still waiting. For the 17th time they were by to tell me that all was going well and I thought I'd pass that along to you. More updates will follow as they become available.
11:40 Addendum: I am sitting in this rather sterile room awaiting Teresa's arrival. I haven't heard anything as yet but I am sure she'll be coming in fairly soon. So far the major highlight has been watching Mr. Urstadt(sp?) parade up and down the hall taking his morning exercise. Very impressive to see a man of his years walking at that speed with such ease. Very, very, impressive watching the nurse trying to persuade him to slip on another robe to cover his ass so to speak. He's having none of it, and in fact if it weren't for the occassional wink that he tosses in the nurse's direction you'd think he was oblivious to her.
They just called to report Teresa is in recovery. So that's good news. Before I was distracted by the errant hinder I was commenting on the sterile environs which will soon be Teresa'a home for a few days. Attached to the ceiling is a contraption like the one on the left. When they finally bring her in I hope she is asleep. She isn't going to be happy when they do this to her.

restless night

Restless night's sleep. Strange bed, strange noises, weird visions in my head. Heading to the hospital at 5:15 to check in at 5:45. Come back for an update later.

here's the plan

Here's the group shot we took yesterday. I love these pictures Regis takes with the tripod because they look like everybody squeezed into a small space and the last person jumped in at the last second. That's how it is. Regis and I with our white hair should not have been in the front because we took a lot of the flash, but that's ok.

Amber's brother Mikey, on the right next to Reg, just got his commercial pilot's license. He said this means he can fly for hire. That sounds so exotic and cool. Lot of northern folks in the picture: Mike and Peggy are from Grand Rapids, Mikey from Grand Forks, Glen from Brainerd, and the rest of us are from around here...or from Pennsylvania. Who'd a thought.

My surgery, which seemed like it took forever to arrive, is finally tomorrow. Regis and I are leaving for Rochester about 2:00 so we can check into our motel, meet Pepsi, have dinner with Steve and Sherry and Catie, and get to bed early. I have to call the hospital between 8 and 10 tonight to see what time to report in the morning. The last time I checked, I was first on the list so if I haven't been bumped, that will be 7:00. I'm guessing I'll be done about noon, but since I haven't had surgery since I was about 4 (back in the days of ether), I don't know.

Regis will call if you want him to...or send a text...and tell you I'm fine and awake. I'll try to post something later with more details so if you're the curious type, let me know you want a call or check back here.

Regis bought himself a Kindle yesterday. Actually it was a present, but that doesn't matter. He saw Betty's on Friday night and his eyes lit up. I knew he'd love it, gadget man and reader that he is. Both Jill and Tom said they noticed that after some time using it, they went to turn the page. Meaning I guess that you make the adjustment from reading a book to reading on the screen very easily. Amazing. You can subscribe to newspapers and they down load automatically and wirelessly. How do it know?

Because I'm an over-packer, I'm going to make a pile of stuff to take, then I'm going to take half of it out. I know I'll have too much and Regis will get a backache toting my bag down the long hallways. I can't wear any make-up or jewelry tomorrow. Eeeeuw. That will be creepy. Here's a website where you can watch a video of a real surgery.

I may end up writing some more today because I can see I'm not much in a mood to be productive.

saturday night in pictures

bird

This is the redwing blackbird who has been frequenting our feeder this week. He may have up to 15 females making nests in his territory. No wonder he has to come to a birdfeeder. He's too tired to perch on a cattail and look for bugs.

saturday

We went to Tom and Betty's last night for pizza rustica. Tom says it's a traditional Italian Easter pie made with four cheeses and hard salami. This is not Tom's in the picture but it looks kind of like the one Tom made. It was gorgeous and delicious with a bottle of Puck's Pride red wine from Morgan Creek. As happens when old friends get together, lots of stories were told and a few laughs were had.

While we were there, Betty's sister called to say her mom had taken a turn for the worse and Betty should come. It was a airline ticket snafu with Regis, customer service agent extraordinaire, coming to the rescue. He got on the internet and the phone and in about twenty minutes, had her a good ticket at at a reasonable price. I told him it was like the customer service olympics...performing for an audience of five.


A couple years ago, we had these weird holes in our yard that we thought were moles. Might have been moles that time, I guess. I noticed holes again a few weeks ago but this time we think they're from chipmunks. We've seen one running around the yard and in the bird feeder. I suppose the yard nazi next door will be setting traps once he sees them. Not me. They don't eat much and they don't bother me.

Wait a minute. When I went to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, I glanced out the window and saw three rabbits in the garden. It's like a wildlife farm out there today. I used to curse the neighbor's cat but I think it helped to keep the rodentia population down although Regis tells me that rabbits are not rodents because their scrotums are in front of their penises instead of behind as in rodents. There's a fact for you.

This falls into the category of things that are funny one night and not so much the next day. Regis came home with a note in his pocket on which he had written these two phrases. When I said them, we laughed and laughed. Now, I can't figure out why. Here they are:

• of which I were not any
• of whom I was not one

Must have been the wine that made it funny.

I better get out of my chair and get something done around here.

what month is this?

Next Plains snowstorm getting ready

A band of moderate to heavy snowfall sets up across eastern Nebraska, southern Minnesota, Iowa and central Wisconsin. Significant accumulations of snow are expected.

They can't be serious.

I am not wearing boots again. I'm not putting on those ice cleats to walk around in April. I won't get the mittens out again and I refuse to wear a winter coat. I have sandals out. The sweaters are gone. Do I sound desperate?

Where are the daffodils???

observations

Regis and I went to Patrick's for dinner. I was eavesdropping on a booth down the way that contained two gentlemen who, by looking, were not much older than we are. The one guy said to the waitress, "So, what's the deal with these wings? What are they?" She tries to explain chicken wings. Then he says, "What's honey mustard sauce?" And she tried to explain honey mustard: "Um, it's honey and mustard in a sauce." I could tell she wanted to say, "Jeeez, dude, don't you ever get out?"

I've had a head cold for two days. I've tried everything for a cure: dayquil, cetirizine, tylenol, hot brandy, buffalo wings. Not all at the same time, of course, but nothing works. Actually the buffalo wings worked as well as anything. I will never brag again about not having a cold for a long time. Hubris.

I've been thinking about children I knew who are now adults. When they're kids, you think they are always going to be reprobates but somehow they grow up to be productive citizens. Here are some examples:

Nick came to visit when he was about four. My husband (at the time) had never experienced children that age so when Nick had a tantrum about something and grabbed our ficus tree and shook it like a hurricane force wind, we looked askance and tried to imagine that he would not wind up in prison. He's a social studies teacher now, studying to be a school administrator.

Nathan was the child of some friends who often stayed later than might have been good for a child. When they woke Nathan to go home, he would do that stiffening up thing and slide through their arms into a pile on the floor. Sometimes it took a long time to persuade him to move toward the car. He teaches flight lessons to pilots at a major university now. (I just read that sentence over...flight lessons to pilots as opposed to flight lessons to passengers. Now that's funny.)

Sarah's parents built a house and lived in a camper one summer when she was a child. When we went to visit, she would come around the corner of the house, blonde curly hair full of leaves, mud up to her knees, like a feral child. She just completed a master's degree in math and is doing research to prepare for a Ph. D.

True stories. There are some lessons here for parents. And maybe teachers. And for humans. Kids don't come out fully formed so don't expect much until they grow up.

My ribs hurt from sneezing. Not coughing, sneezing. These are sneezes that will knock you on your ass. Not sneezing for sissies. I saw the president on tv last night. He sounded like he had a cold but he wasn't sneeziing or wiping his nose. I want his doctors and his drugs.

Hey, there's a new waitress at Patrick's who is from London. I asked her if she knew the Beatles. I didn't really, but I asked the next waitress (not from London) and she said she knew OF the Beatles. Ahhhh. It served me right.

Well, that's enough silliness for one night.

narcissism

So, after I post my whine about cold, I remember these wonderful pictures Tom sent of the flooding on the Red River. Interesting that I'm reading The Last Report on the Miracles at Little No Horse and the first part is about a big flood on the Red River.

Wednesday

Ugh. Blergh. I was bragging a few weeks ago that I hadn't had a cold for years. Well, I'm getting paid back for my pitiful lack of humility. It's mostly in the upper right quadrant of my head: I feel pretty good from the neck down but shitty from the neck up. My right nostril and right eye are like unfettered faucets. It's ugly.

Tuesday

I came down with something today which seemed like allergies because it snuck up on me for about four days but it didn't get better today when I doubled the dose of Zyrtec so now I'm suspecting a cold again. I don't have a fever or anything so maybe it's just a messy head cold that will be gone in a few days. Crap anyway.

We didn't get any snow today until just a few minutes ago. It's more flurries than real snow. We don't need any blizzards on April 1st. Even as it is, it's not appealing this late in the season. How is a guy supposed to dress in this weather? It's April so it looks a little goofy to be wearing sweaters and wool socks.

Oh no. Snowflakes coming faster.

We had turkey brats that I had fantasized about cooking on the grill. They're not very appealing cooked in a pan on the stove but neither us had any interest in dragging the grill out of the garage.

I have to fix the code on my stat counter.

catching up on stuff

My friends had a lovely shower for Tiffany and Elliot on Saturday. It was a feat of organization for which I was not wholly responsible but pulled off my part with aplomb. I'm not sure that's true but I had to end that sentence somehow. It was lovely and makes me feel like I did after I gave birth...like I should send everyone emotion-filled thank you notes. It's touching that my friends just take me and my children in and express such generosity and kindness toward them. I could never repay them.

The pictures are in slideshow format at the bottom. Here they are on Picasa if you want to download or upload.

My mom came, which was very nice. We had a grand time at the shower and later at our house. Her friend Marilyn accompanied her so she didn't have to drive alone. Nothing like a road trip. We took them out for breakfast to the Northwoods Cafe the next morning, then they went on their way to Luverne for Rachel's confirmation.

Alex was baptized on Saturday so that's two in one weekend for God's army. One for the Pope and one for Luther.

Regis and I stopped at Kohls then I came home to nap while he did the dishes. What a good man. I headed to Rochester about 3 where I met up with Steve, Sherry, and Catie for pizza and beer. If you were on the road yesterday you might have noticed that the water (lakes and such) were the brightest blue you could imagine. Gorgeous. Good to visit with S, S, and C and reacquaint with Pepsi, the Dog Cousin. He had his bow-tie on in my honor. I think they were tempted to send him home with me. Oh, no. No more Jack Russell Terrorists in this house!

I spent today at Mayo doing all the pre-op stuff. It was interesting and all. The MRI was creepy and I had to keep my eyes shut to keep from freaking out. I had to refrain from food and drink until that was over at almost 1:00. After being shut up in that little tube for 45 minutes and dehydrated as an old mushroom, I was wobbly. You'd think they could do better than a drinking fountain. I went to the coffee shop and sucked down a carton of skim milk, a protein bar, and a latte so fast it made my head spin even more than the MRI. I hope my liver did itself proud.

The anesthesia doctor who reviewed all my tests said I'm very healthy except for, and get this, being a little on the heavy side. Jeebus. What does he think I'm there for, a hair transplant?

I'm having a bit of an allergy issue lately. Last year about this time was my first attack. I snored so loud I woke myself up. Scary.

Time to go to bed. I have several new books but the one I'm going to re-read first is: The Last Report on the Miracles at Little No Horse.

friday

Regis and I went to the grocery store after work today. Of course, it's a mad house at that time of the week. It went alright until we were checking out. The bag boy in our aisle and the one in the next aisle were making sexual gestures at each other with packages of bratwurst and a box of food storage bags. Honestly. Do they think we're so old and addled that we wouldn't figure that out? I suppose if you're 15 and have to work at the grocery store on Friday night, it's anything for a thrill.

I spent part of my day doing these things at school: isolating a problem with the phone lines, attempting to fix two toilets, and talking to the tech guy about software. I asked him if he had been up all night...what he was saying made no sense to me. Ah, it was a productive day.

One thing I've noticed about searching google for images lately is that a lot of them have copyright stuff on them. I'm scared of the copyright police so I hesitate. I'm such a chicken.

Some friends of mine are having a baby shower for Tiffany tomorrow. I hesitate about that kind of thing, too...worrying that I am commiting social faux pas in triplicate. Do people like to be invited to things like that? I worry too much lately.

I'm not sure if I mentioned in this venue that my surgery is April 6th. I'm planning to go back to work on the 20th. About every other day I get freaky and worried, then the next day I'm fine. Monday I go to Mayo for all the pre-op appointments. I'm looking forward to that actually because I like all those people so much. One of the things I'm doing is having an MR elasto something or other as part of a research study. (It's like an MRI but it measures something else.) The hope is that some day they can do this procedure rather than a liver biopsy which is costly and invasive. Anybody read the book Coma? Just kidding.

Going to bed to read....

bright thing in the sky

It snowed off and on all day today, never accumulating, but making it look like winter. About an hour ago, we had 30 seconds of sunshine. It's only 30 degrees so not exactly basking weather. I'm not complaining. My brother, Bruce, reports from Fargo:

They just raised the crest to 42 feet with a possibility of 43. The flood
in 97 got to just over 39 feet. We SHOULD be safe, but who knows. Sewage
backup is a distinct possibility. I've been sandbagging every day; they
estimate that 10,000 people a day have been volunteering to sandbag. We've
done just about all that can be done, now we need a bit of luck. It would
make a hell of a documentary...it's like a war zone with all the activity.
People have come from Canada, Florida, Alaska, Minnesota, South Dakota and
beyond.

Uff da is all I can think of to say. It's touching that people come out to help in disasters like this mess in Fargo and our tornado. I remember groups of men coming down the street with chain saws and lunch buckets. It made me cry. It does bring out the best in people. And it keeps them from watching Fox News which isn't a bad thing either. That's my cynical side.

clothes that would be hideous on 99.9% of the population

Regis is watching one of those loathsome movies about the end of the world. Some nuclear war thing. I don't like to think about that much less see it represented visually on a big screen. If you can call a 19 inch tv a big screen. It's hideous...perpetual winter and the faces are blue and frost covered and everybody talks in those old soap opera urgent voices. Who needs that kind of nightmare?

We went to the bike shop to pick up my new bike. It was damn cold standing in their parking lot while they attached the rack to the car. They are so careful to give you instructions on every part of the experience but in this cold, who cares. If the thing flies off at the first intersection, oh well.

We cruised around the shop for a while as we waited. Did you know there are bike outfits that are made of very fitted nylon with padded seats and little skinny straps? They're called bib cycling shorts. I told Regis we should buy some but one of the neighbors might (most likely would) call the cops. He said it would be so creepy we would probably call the cops on ourselves.

Time to go and turn the mattress pad up to high and crawl in with a book. Happy spring. What kind of mittens does a guy wear in April?

march in minnesota

Snow occurring on Mar 26 | Mar 27. Total amount 5 Inches.

Heavy rain occurring on Mar 23 | Mar 24 | Mar 26. Total amount 1.08 Inches.

Ice occurring on Mar 27. Total amount 0.2 Inches.

High wind occurring on Mar 23 | Mar 27. Maximum sustained 36 mph (maximum gust 52 mph).

High probability of thunderstorms occurring on Mar 23.

If there is any other damn inclement weather we could have within the next few days, I don't know what it might be. Remember the 29th of March is the anniversary of the tornado so there is nothing that we loathe more than high winds. Unless it's high winds in combination with ice. Lovely.

done

We swooped by Herberger's and I bought my socks. Then we went to the grocery store where it smells funny and customers wear mullets. Regis gets so frustrated trying to park there because everybody drives a 1992 Park Avenue and goes 16 miles per hour because their cataracts are so bad they can't see. I said he either has to calm down or we have to start buying coffee somewhere else.

Then we went to the bike shop sale at the old mall. A fast-talking (not in a bad way...he just ought to lay off the caffeine) salesman sold me this little number in the picture above. I took it for a spin in the parking lot and loved it. It has three-speeds which are plenty because I usually forget to shift anyway. We're going to pick it up on Wednesday. We both bought helmets...reference my fear of head injuries.

The weather outside is bad-ass dreadful. I felt like I had dirt in my teeth and my hair was standing on end. Garbage was blowing through the air and the wind was howling nasty ass loud. The thermometer says 55 but I don't think so. Wicked wind chill. There aren't words to describe crappy weather like this obviously since I used ass twice in one paragraph.


On our way home, we slowed way down to let a couple wild turkeys cross the road. I told Regis (again) the story of my victimhood at the hands of a wild turkey. He laughed and expressed skepticism. People always do when I tell this story but it's true.

In April, Will Millington was riding his dirt bike down a narrow trail in Norman, Okla., when he stopped before a flock of wild turkeys. The hens scattered, but two toms flared their feathers and stalked toward him. Then they suddenly leapt in the air, beat Mr. Millington with their wings and tried to scratch him with the sharp spurs on the backs of their legs.

Wild-turkey flocks have a pecking order. If they live around humans, some of the dominant toms may begin to include people in that order — at a level below themselves. Lovett Williams, a Florida biologist, recalls that when he raised wild turkeys, he sometimes had to establish dominance by grabbing an obnoxious bird around the neck and holding it on the ground so it couldn't scratch with its spurs. "I'd slap him like they do on the Three Stooges," he says. "Then they'd wobble around and run off."

There you go.

as done as it's gonna get

It's 12:30 and I'm done. No doubt there are more dust bunnies and dirt clumps hiding behind chairs and in places where I don't see, but I've sucked, wiped, and washed a ton of dirt out of this house in the last two days.

Regis and I are going to Mankato to snoop around. I'm in the market for a new bike, we want to buy a bike rack for the car, and I want some pastel socks. We might have dinner at our favorite Mexican restaurant to celebrate the cleaning of the abode.

Oh, I cleaned out the refrigerator today, too. Amazing the stuff that gets pushed to the back of the shelves. I found two cans of Busch beer (Betty?) and one can of Hamm's. Most other things were identifiable but not edible. As hard as we've tried to clean out the freezer this winter, we have made no progress. Things must go in as fast as they come out. Comforting to know in the event of a disaster, we would have a constant food supply.

The wind is picking up. Ugh. My least favorite weather event.

every day should be saturday

My goal for the weekend was to clean our house. It didn't happen last night because we had a serendipitous meeting of friends and family (including Ella and Alex) at the watering hole. Reg and Amber came to visit later and then we went to bed. So much for that day.

I didn't have any grand plans to get started early so it was about 9:00 when I got started in the bedroom. I set the timer for 55 minutes and then I allowed my galley slave self a break for a cup of coffee and a piece of toast. It went like that through the next three rooms. By 3 o'clock, I was done in and tired of it so I told Regis to set up the lawn chairs under the birch tree.

Several of the neighbors wandered over and we celebrated the start of spring by sharing beers and wine in the warm sun. It was grand. Katherine toddled around and ate some dirt and drank a juice box. She seemed to enjoy her first outdoor happy hour.

I'm trying to get organized before my surgery on April 6th. Of course, there are things I will never get done and should probably just forget about. Cleaning the basement, for example. Ha! I'd like to get the garden cleaned up and might have to hire that done. Digging in the dirt and hauling vegetation might be beyond me for a while.

I have a bookshelf I meant to clean off before the ecology club fund raiser but I think I missed the deadline. That's exactly how I am. I went to Herberger's the other day and forgot about the donation thing where you can get 20% off. WTF. All I had to do was throw my old pajamas in a bag. They just do that to make a person like me flog herself for having a crappy memory. Shit.

I have all kinds of irrational fears about surgery since I haven't had any (surgery) since I was 4 years old. That was more than 50 years ago holy shit. They don't use ether anymore, do they? The nurse when I had my tonsils out was mean and I don't think they're like that anymore. Regis thinks I should take my computer so I can post a blog entry the night after I go under the knife. (What a weird expression...) We'll see how that goes. I'm a nervous patient. Should I tell them that? When I have an endoscopy, I tell EVERYONE in the outpatient area...I'm a nervous patient, don't let me choke, I'm worried about choking, I'm a nervous patient. I'm sure those health care professionals talk about me when they have drinks after work.

I swear the birds were having a major singles club gathering in the trees behind our house today. They were everywhere and they were loud. There's a huge fat robin in the apple tree now. I love spring.

wicked shopping trip

And I don't mean that in a good way. I hate shopping. I had a list but it didn't work because I had too many places to go and not enough time. I had printed a baby registry for the Potts twins but in my blizzardy mental state, I couldn't find anything. (I finally did so the babies won't be presentless...). I wanted to buy shower presents for Alex and Elliot but had an idea not found at that store...so thinking ahead I bought gift bags and little cards and tissue. Then of course, I couldn't find what I wanted so the bags are kind of big for what I did find. Damn.

The clothes I had in my head for myself were not to be found on a rack anywhere. I decided I don't have a "look". I need a look. Need help with this. Help.

Right at the end of the work day, a woman from a copier company stopped by to see if she could "assess our copier needs". What the hell. She was a little creepy...a little too perfect like a pod person. (Really shiny choppers.) I was distracted by that and couldn't concentrate on our copier needs. I don't think it matters if we want a copier that staples and emails and scans, really. Our needs will be usurped by the budget. Besides we already have a scanner that we have never bothered to learn to use so this could mean that we don't really need one. She seemed to think this made us part of alien species. I told you she was a pod person.

A person like me should not be in charge of stuff like copiers which is what makes this funny...I'm not. She wanted my card and that makes her the first person in years who has asked for my card. I'm not even sure the phone number is current. Do people really use cards anymore?

I saw Patrick for a haircut this evening. He's my hair artist and I never tell him what to do. I have opinions about a lot of things but not hair. Except for the times he gives me a mirror, I never look at the back of my hair which might be painfully obvious to people who see it from behind. It's like my philosophy of house cleaning...the things you can't see can't hurt you, i.e. dust and cobwebs.

Now that I've revealed a variety of my personal flaws: not good at shopping, not good at clothes, not good at copiers, not good at hair design, not good at house cleaning, I'm going to bed.

how did it get to be wednesday already

We've had a quiet week. No green beer for us last night, we had corned beef and cabbage for dinner and watched one of Regis' all-time favorite movies, The Quiet Man. I like all of it except the last fight scene. There are some great lines.

We went to Barnes and Noble tonight with my Valentine money and my three-page list. It's hard to shop at B&N with a list because they won't give you access to a computer to find anything and they have their books grouped all weird. Why couldn't they have a computer like the public library so I could find things myself? They're very helpful if you ask, but I'd like to just browse around and find them myself. I bought these things:

1. Cutting for Stone by Abraham Verghese
2. The Red Convertible by Louise Erdrich
3. The Best Essays of 2008
4. Dalva by Jim Harrison
5. A couple others that I can't see from here...

Numbers one and two are hardcover books and I usually hesitate to buy them because they're expensive. Erdrich and Verghese (The Tennis Partner) are favorite authors, though, so I'm sure I'll like them. Maybe I'll figure out a way to post my long list.

I've noticed a movement toward thermostat diminishment of which I am not fond. I'm just saying, it's cold everywhere I go. Are we going to have to dress like Tibetan yak herders INDOORS from now on? And probably smell like the yaks by the end of the day.

I've had a paranoia this winter about falls and head injuries (in combination) so the tragic news about the actress who fell on the ski slope and died, with no bloody cut or apparent injury, was about enough to send me into a spin. Does a guy have to wear a helmet all the time? Holy shit life is scary.

It's Tiffany's birthday today! Happy birthday to you, Tiff! She's 24 years old.

I took a day off from swimming today but I'm back in the water tomorrow. Next week, I'm going to start alternating swimming and walking. I'm beginning to feel a little water-logged. And the water has been chilly which I hate. Yesterday I snuck into the hot tub (verboten by the motel police) and that didn't even feel very warm.

Regis has the car buying bug. Not many things I hate more than car buying. If you could just walk in and say I'll take that in red and feel like you got a fair price, it would be one thing. But, it's another thing and we all know what it is.

How did it get to be 8:30 already?

pre-st. patty's day

Tom and Betty had us over for corned beef and cabbage pizza. I must say we were skeptical about the concept but it was delicious. A ten on a scale of "I must make this again" and Tom's crust would rival the best pizza parlor. Many signs of spring in Minnesota today. Tom almost whacked me when I said I didn't want it to get too warm too fast. After all my griping about the cold, I guess. We even saw a teenager walking barefoot. I bet his mother whacked him when he got home.

alex and ella

Regis and I went over to see Ella and Alex today. I asked if I could hold Alex and Ella said, "No, he's too heavy." She helped me hold the baby and shared my lap. She enjoyed the presents from Jill...especially the tiny purse! The two quarters that Popop found in her ears went in the purse. Alex is thriving and I got the whole baby experience in an hour...feeding, changing, burping.

Our neighbor, Paul, invited us over for the first barbecue of the season. How could we say no? He made a wonderful loin roast and twice baked potatoes. We got some funny looks from passers-by as there was still snow on the ground in some places but the sun felt good. Hard to believe that it was zero on Tuesday.

We love weekends. This is what we hope being retired is like...always Saturday.

regis and teresa cook

Betty found a comfortable chair by the bookshelf where she could put her foot up. We talked about books and movies mostly...some cooking. And our plans for outdoor improvements this spring. Betty's planing vines and adding trellises to their patio area...we're putting in the Howard Fritsch Memorial Patio under the birch tree.

Tom went from vertical to horizontal several times throughout the afternoon as he was tired. He had to share the love seat with the dog who enjoyed the attention.

Regis made this delicious prime rib roast. I made a dish called colcannon to accompany...mashed potatoes with leeks, shallots, and napa cabbage. I thought it was delicious. Regis would rather keep his cabbage separate apparently as his reviews were not so good.

I tried to get Peter to take the Irish glasses to Mankato with him. I said they'd be chick magnets but he didn't think so.

I made a chocolate stout cake that is delicious but this year, the top of the damn cake stuck in the pan so it didn't look so pretty. The genache covered it up for the most part. No complaints on the final course which was served with Irish coffee.

I spend more time on the tablecloth and the glassware than dusting the furniture and scrubbing the floors.

Peter bought a new video game so he was preoccupied with that but he spent some time visiting with us. And eating. As I was taking this picture, he said, "Don't take my picture and put it on your blog". Ok.

We had some nice Irish cheeses with a baguette and an onion soup made with Guinness. The best cheese was called Prairie Breeze from the coop.

All in all, it was a good meal and the company was great. Beautiful day...we even had the door open for a while until Regis got hot from the sun coming in...how's that for a change?

We love weekends.

What She Taught Me

What She Taught Me

For Mom

She taught me knitting, sewing, Teeny Tiny,

and reading every night before you go

to bed. She taught me how to make things for

people you love. She taught me how to make

stuffing by letting the butter and chopped onions sit

on the stovetop overnight. She taught me how to

make spaghetti from scratch

and that leftovers make a good meal and that pets,

even messy ones who come through the screen door

during thunderstorms, are part of the family.

She taught me that it’s more important to bake

fresh cookies or to read a book that

have a clean house. She taught me that having piles

of books around your house is decorating and that wearing

a flannel nightgown until noon doesn’t mean you’re

lazy. She taught me that you invite people over

if you’re lonely. She taught me how to always

believe you can fix it yourself and to keep on learning

and that when you go on vacation you should

stay with relatives. She taught me that cookbooks make good

reading and if you don’t have what it calls

for, you use something else. She taught me that hunting

down a good deal and taking a long nap in the afternoon is

the only exercise you ever really need in life.

When my dad died, her husband of more than fifty years, she

taught me that you cry but you go on. You go on living. You keep

the ashes in the window sill, you tell stories about the memories

and you laugh and you cry. But you keep on living.

51 on saturday and we're looking for flat rocks on which to bask

Seriously. 51 degrees on Saturday. We've had 35 days of below zero temperatures since December 1st. That is brutal. Brutal. For those of you who live in warmer climates, a below zero temperature is a negative number way below where water freezes, at 32 degrees. Thirty-two degrees colder than that is ZERO. Ah well, never mind.

Our dog, Kramer, who got a haircut yesterday. We turned down the senior dog wellness plan that allows for a teeth-cleaning at a reduced price. This is a 12 year old dog who has already had a multi-thousand dollar eye surgery. I can't explain why we did this. I didn't even want to buy a 12-month supply of heart worm medication. I thought we could go with the 6-month plan and see how his health is at that point. Regis says I'm heartless. I love my dogs but they're dogs. I remember the days when they lived in dog houses outside. Our sissy dog doesn't like to lay on the bare leather, he likes a blanket.

I took today off from swimming after going to bed at 8:30 last night and sleeping until 7:00 this morning. I took my time leaving the house, drinking coffee, eating a little breakfast while seated unlike the last few days of eating on the run. I feel so much better tonight as I'm not a person who appreciates a fast pace.

Regis is sampling the Mr. Beer tonight. He likes the taste but it generates a lot of, shall we say, methane. I can tell from the belching going on and have warned him that this might not an activity he wants to pursue. Look for the green mushroom cloud over our house.

I've gotten really finicky about the books I'm reading. I quit a book in the middle last week and started The Book Thief. It's very good (wonderful writing where you need sticky flags to mark sentences...) but damn it, I'm not sure I want to read something that intense. I'm a sissy, I know. Or a dork. I have about five favorite authors and they better keep writing because I don't know what I'll do if they die or retire. Uh oh, Bill.

I have to go pay attention to 30 Rock.

winter continues to flog us, especially in Fargo

I went to the vet clinic to pick the dog up from his grooming (and well-dog) visit. We picked a bad day to have the dog's hair cut. I think I heard him murmur f*#* you as he lifted his leg on the way back to the car and the stream of pee turned to a yellow icicle. Hey, I was blown down the sidewalk by a gust of wind and had to re-park in order to walk on the snow rather than end up on my hinder on the ice. A guy has to put rocks in his pockets and a pillow on his ass if he's going to travel in this weather.

I'm not complaining, though. My brother Bruce sent a picture (top) of his front door in Fargo after yesterday's blizzard. The snow was up to the middle of the door. Drifting or not, that sucks. And blows. When this snows melts in two days over the weekend, everyone along the Red River will need water wings.

Regis sent an email to the restaurant where we ate Sunday, just tipping them off that they might want to do a thorough cleaning. The response was, get this, a request for the name of our server so they would have some incite into the problem. You can get all the incite you want pal, and it isn't going to make your joint cleaner. Incite. Good grief. And let's blame the guy at the end of the food chain, shall we?

Peter works for a fast-food sandwich shop in Mankato called Subway. He makes a tiny bit over minimum wage and until last week, was able to eat a sandwich for 50% off while he worked. They have eliminated that program for all but the office staff so when he works he pays full price for his food. He and the other sandwich slaves have decided to pool their money and order pizza while they're working which isn't such a good marketing plan for Subway. Way to go, Corporate America. The office staff really need a break on the cost of food.

The new economic stimulus (Bless the President's heart; I know he means well.) amounted to 34 bucks on my check. I don't get it until Friday but I'm going out to spend it tonight. I want to get that money into the economy as quickly as possible.

When we stopped to drop our ES money, we ran into Mike and Erin, neighbors across the street and their sweet baby, Katherine Nova. We don't see our neighbors very often in in the winter in Minnesota. They don't have an attached garage either so the chances are greater as we make our way from snowy driveway to house. Katherine has changed since we saw her at the county fair: she's eating chicken strips and french fries with ketchup now.

I had an email from Mom today. She had company on Monday, Bob Bengtson and his wife Marilyn. Bob's my friend who is famous for his poems on sticks. His books of poetry are like talismans; I pack them into my bags and carry them with me when I go places. There's something about knowing the poet, or hearing him read his poems out loud, that makes the words more powerful. You hear, forever, their voices in your head. The written words are never just on the page after that.

It seems unnatural for it to be so light out at the same time that it's so cold... and 7 o'clock in the evening. Somehow it's more tolerable when it's dark.

I've used the word dork about four times today. That seems to be indicative of something. Maybe that I'm hanging around a lot of dorks. Now that's funny.

still winter

I'm not going to complain about the weather, believe it or not. I will tell you that the snow, which is not apparent on any radar I've looked at tonight, due to the wind blowing 40 mph. We're such optimistic sops in Minnesota; everybody says this won't last long and it will melt right away. What difference does that make when it's ten days away from spring and you still have to dress like you're taking a dog sled over the tundra.

I know I've made some mental notes for new posts over the last few days of non-blogging but I've forgotten what they were.

Whoa, the snow blows so hard every few minutes that I can't see across the street. I was ready to call the patio man the other day. Karl's going to give us some tips and maybe do the manual labor of root-chopping and hole-digging. Tom and a few of the other men offered to help but we have an aversion to sweat and more of an attraction to the creative side of patio building.

I dread swimming the next two days. It's been nice to have more moderate temperatures that don't require until noon to defrost after going back out into the cold.

I have to take the dog into the groomer tomorrow and I dread that, too. Ever since he grabbed the cheek of that little white, fluffy dog and made him cry like a baby. I'm hoping that his vision has deteriorated to the point that he won't be so aggressive. He's very sweet with people but he disdains animals with a vengeance. When we used to take him to the eye clinic in Plymouth, they cleared the waiting room for us. He's a twenty-pound furry death machine.

My twenty-one year old son is at work in Mankato. I want to call him and tell him to be careful on his way home but I suppose that's dumb as he's old enough to figure that out for himself. One of the things I'm painfully aware of again with the birth of the babies in our family: it's like letting your heart walk around outside your body.

I think I'm going to turn my mattress pad up to high and go to bed.

Elliot 9 days old

saturday

Regis and I went on a mission for Irish whiskey this weekend. We checked at our local joint last night but not so much luck. Today, in the March mist, we took a drive to Mankato and found what we wanted. See the photo.

More tomorrow.

damned internet provider

Bees

by Jane Hirshfield

In every instant, two gates.
One opens to fragrant paradise, one to hell.
Mostly we go through neither.

Mostly we nod to our neighbor,
lean down to pick up the paper,
go back into the house.

But the faint cries—ecstasy? horror?
Or did you think it the sound
of distant bees,
making only the thick honey of this good life?

"Bees" by Jane Hirshfield from The Lives of the Heart. © Harper Perennial, 1997.

So many sad things this week: Bill Holm, Charlene Hegland, Phil Keillor. It seems fitting for this time of year when you can't tell where the land ends and the sky begins. I feel like my nerves are sticking outside my skin and everything is irritating. Everything brushes against me like sandpaper. Wine doesn't help for long.

I made a meatloaf for dinner which is an odd thing for an early spring dinner, I know. In the time it was cooking, I lost interest so we had meatloaf and ketchup, or meatloaf and bread and ketchup as you preferred. No sides, as Peter observed. Hey, they sell potatoes at McDonald's and Taco Johns.

Regis took the dog out for a walk which irritates me because it's icy in spots although he won't admit it. He could fall down and crack his head and die. Some days I am more circumspect about this and realize you can't sit around your house avoiding falls and accidents. Today, I think you should sit around your house and avoid accidents and death.

There's a great article in Vanity Fair about Tina Fey. She is a rule follower, a life philosophy I ascribe to. Don't drive along side semi trucks. Don't get on carnival rides. Don't put paper in beer bottles. Don't play with shiny garbage. Follow the rules and bad things won't happen to you.

I'm planning a meal for next week: prime rib roast, Yorkshire pudding, and a Guinness cake. That's all that's on the menu for now. The Irish were not known for their cooking (my theory after viewing hundreds of recipes for cabbage and potatoes) so I might keep it simple. The Yorkshire pudding sort of puts a crimp in my style as I like to make Irish soda bread but you can't have that many breads at a meal and no vegetable. One bread has to be beer.

I worked really hard this week so the tax payers can feel vindicated. Here I am feeding at the public trough. Not that I don't work hard every week but this week, I especially worked my fingers to the bone and I have piles of paperclipped stuff to prove it. You could probably put all that shit in the recycler on Monday and nobody would ever be the wiser. Is this how I spend my life? A friend of mine told me today that work really gets in the way of her life. I feel like that, too, somedays.

If it doesn't snow on Sunday, we're going to meet Tiffany and Eric at Don Pablo's in Bloomington. I'll get to hold Elliot again. I can hear him in the background when Tiffany calls. It makes my heart hurt. She said she can't believe you can fall in love with a baby so fast. I remember clearly that I did the first time I saw her picture.

Peter is off to Mankato tonight, being a little vague about his plans...a bar, a band, a friend. That's as much as we know.

Charlene's funeral is tomorrow. Bill Holm's on Sunday.

Happy birthday, Mark.

Laurel, buy a big red spatula. I heard you mom say she'd get you one so don't let her get a cheap plastic one. Something heavy and colorful will do.

Jane, enjoy the outdoors in St. Louis. We're jealous. Here's the drink list: Harvey Wallbanger, margarita, vodka tonic, martini, and whiskey sour. Hi to Darla and AJ.

Deb and Larry, have a good time in Rome. Rent mopeds and drink limoncello. Not at the same time.

Tom, thanks for the blue cheese dressing recipe. The stuff I buy for five dollars in the styrofoam cup is so good...why do I want to make it myself?

This kind of sounds like the end of the prairie home companion. It must be time to go to bed.

galactic leadership

I picked up some Morgan Creek Vineyards wine the other day at MGM when they had the tasting. I recommend it. I like the Seyval, a popular French dry white, light fruit barrel aged in French oak. That last part I got from the website as I'm not much of a wine connoisseur. I even had to look connoisseur up on google to see how to spell it. If you can't spell it, you aren't one.

There's a very nice obituary for Bill Holm on his website. If anyone reading this would like to read his books, I think I have them all and would be happy to deliver them, along with a bottle of pinot noir. I have some favorite things: the essay about Darin Gislason's garden in The Music of Failure, an essay called Horizontal Grandeur (which I have mailed to many people and which always comes up when we talk about the prairie), his book Coming Home Crazy, and the book The Heart Can Be Filled Anywhere on Earth.

My friend Coni once worked at a restaurant in the old Carnegie Library in St. Peter. Bill came in one night after a reading, got carried away and entertained the place for hours with song and story. Drawn by his booming voice and hearty laugh, everyone in the place had pulled up a chair in the vicinity of his table by the time it was all over. He left Coni a 20 dollar tip which was a big tip in a small town restaurant in those days.

Our new babies are doing fine. Elliot went on his first outing today and behaved himself quite nicely, according to his mama. We saw Alex yesterday and he's thriving.

Ella the First Baby (this is a title like The President) is coming to see us tomorrow night. We might go to McDonald's for dinner and play with Play Do. She likes to snuggle in bed and read books. Maybe she'll want to play with the tea cups. When she's here, we do whatever she wants because she's the First Baby. I was there the day she was born and heard her first cry. It was quite a moment, let me tell you. Tears were shed. I'm the designated weeper at all births and marriages.

I'm also the weeper at the start of parades (4th of July), at the end of parades (Macy's Thanksgiving Day), during sad commercials(when the people lose their Traveler's Checks), and at the end of books where animals die. Marley and Me and Seabiscuit, for example. Amazing I can remember all of this but can't remember the names of people I've known for five years.

I just started to read a list of over-used buzzwords but I stopped in the middle. That stuff gets in your head and makes your brain cells spin around like a seat on the Tilt-A-Whirl. It's not healthy for your head. Do a google search and you'll see what I mean.

Don't read it too long is all I'm saying. Someone could do a research study on this: what happens with over-exposure to buzzwords? Does the number of words per sentence in your writing drop? Do you start ending sentences with prepositions? Do you drop the g on present participles? Do you start using like and he goes a lot in your speech? Do you forget about capital letters and punctuation? Do you forget what a semi-colon is for, for God's sake?

beer project

Regis got a Mr. Beer from his younger son for Christmas. Today was the uncapping and you can see the result, a lovely amber beer with a nice head. Hurrah! Thanks, Bob.

Babies are both doing fine. Tiffany reported on Elliot this morning. He is, like most, newborns, determined to eat and sleep whenever he feels like it which means she doesn't sleep much. I tried to assure her that he will settle down in a few days. We stopped this afternoon to see Alex and Ella. Alex is eating and pooping like a champ and therefore growing like a weed. Ella hugged me and kissed me a hundred times and said she missed me. It ain't easy being booted from the throne of 1st Child and I think she recognizes an advocate in her Nana.

I finally did some housework this morning which means I do what I usually do: a half-assed job of most of it and don't finish any of it. It looks better and smells better so we made strides. Regis suggested going over to buy groceries this afternoon so we got that job out of the way, too. We discovered a nice antipasta bar in the HyVee so we brought home a sample of blue cheese stuffed green olives, marinated artichoke hearts, and marinated mushrooms. The things we didn't taste right away are on top of a pizza now.

We had another delicious meal at Tom and Betty's house last night. We ended the evening, as we like to do in the winter, by sitting by the fire. It's a good thing there were no audio taping devices because we got started singing and I'm telling you, there will be no record contracts offered.

I started a facebook page the other day but quickly shut it down. I don't like these things: twitter, facebook, text messaging. I like blogging, I like webpages, I like picasa web albums. I like things that make complete sentences and that have punctuation. I don't care if you just let the cat out or if you had chili for dinner. Unless it makes a good story.